This was the photo that launched my hobby in using photography as a form of artistic expression. I got my first camera when I was maybe 11 years old. It was likely a Kodak Pocket Instamatic with a built in flash. I was enthralled from the moment that I got it. I spent most of my pocket money on film and developing. How fun it was to goof around with my friend Melissa on a Saturday morning taking bed head photos. Then came the week wait for it come back developed. Then followed the disappointment of random body parts captured.
I discovered some of these photos when I was in Oklahoma last fall clearing out my mother's estate: Mixed with the tears was laughter on finding a treasured photo of my dog-Muffin.
The note on the back said Muffin with no head. As if, this photo needed this explanation. I'm guessing the torso is my younger brother's--I failed to note this piece of information. Most my photos from this time is lost, but I found an album of my first years at Oklahoma State. I still haven't gone through it properly. And I found albums of my years in Japan--I found them on the last night and I didn't have time to go through them or room to pack them, instead, I bundled them up and left them at my aunt's along with a few other items that I will pick up in April when I make the trek cross country again.
Photos for me up until about 10 years ago, were a way to document events, capture moments and recall memories. I never considered that I could possibly be an art photographer, a nature photographer, share my photography with others. I never thought I had the skill and most certainly the technical knowledge. But then one day at Descaso Gardens, I had taken my camera with me. As I was walking along the stream, I saw a leaf floating in the water and thought it was pretty. I took the photo and when I downloaded the image, I found that the leaf was very calming. I had copies made and sent it to my mom and a couple of other people. The feedback was positive and suddenly, I realized that I enjoyed taking photos, particularly macro photos--it took me a while to learn the label--and sharing them with others. Eventually, sharing turned into what I call my Card Club and then the purpose of taking photos shifted. I was no longer taking photos to document but to find interesting images that might give others a spark of joy when they opened their mail box to find a new card with a new photo.
Since the leaf photo, I am told that I have a good eye and gradually, I have started calling myself a photographer although the technical side of photography still intimidates me. Often, I feel that I am an imposter but have been working first to make myself OK with not using manual mode on my camera about 97% of the time--it is the art of the image that I have decided to capture and frame--and second to try to close the gap in my. technical skills. As I moved in developing my style and eye, I also began adding text to some of my photos which allows me to combine photography with writing to create something that is uniquely mine.
What I most appreciate about photography is that it gives me a way to express myself. As I expand my skill set and endeavor to get out of my comfort zone, I find growth aspect engaging and uplifting.
Comments